#marriagegoals

For the first time we went as a family to enjoy the fireworks. With our twins finally three-years-old, we felt the effort of keeping kids up four hours past their bedtime would be worth it. You know, the calculated risks we make as parents. It helped to buy popsicles for everyone as they waited!

I’d say it was a successful. We heard excited oohs and ahhs throughout the firework show.   

A favorite part of the night was after the show. I was carrying a very tired 33 pound child. I was speed walking down the 8 blocks to keep my pain as brief as possible. I charged ahead until we came up behind an older couple walking hand in hand. We were about a block and a half away from our car yet, but I chose to walk behind them. I knew it was too dark to get a great picture, but I wanted to capture this moment. They each carried a lawn chair in their outer hand. It wasn’t a well-lit sidewalk at 10:45pm, and so while they were likely holding hands to keep one another steady, the hands seemed so comfortable together. They reached out to one another in love and assurance. #marriagegoals

Do you remember the first time you reached out your hand to your spouse? The first time you held hands while dating? They mock it a bit in commercials. The pinky grazes the others leg or hand. The hands almost collide as they swing out and clumsily find one another while walking out from a restaurant. It’s usually depicted as teens in a movie theater, but I remember it being just as awkward in my 20s.

 

That first time you reach out and don’t know if the other wants to hold your hand. Maybe you tried to signal you wanted to hold hands but they missed it. Then you doubt yourself. Did they miss the signal? Or did they receive it and just not want to hold hands?

 

But that glorious sigh of relief and smile you have when you and your target hold hands. The heart skips a beat and then it rests with some peace of mind.

 

Holding hands is a relationship sign of being on the same page.

 

Now my heart rarely skips a beat with a sudden rush when I hold my husband’s hand, it’s true. But I feel peace when we hold hands. Whether it is while riding in the car, watching a movie, or at the end of a disagreement, the act of holding hands is another act of love. It’s the unspoken signal that we matter more than anything else.

 

When Josh and I have had a hard talk, a disagreement, or angry words, we end with touch. We find a solution, apologize and forgive if applicable, and then touch (hug, kiss, hold hands, etc). Sometimes while we discuss we move closer to touch while we share our thoughts. It is the connection that we try to keep physically, even when our thoughts and feelings might be distant and at odds.

 

When did you reach out to your spouse? Did you reach out in confidence and comfort, or with anxiety? How can you get to the place of the couple walking home on the 4th of July, hand-in-hand? Don’t just envision your marriage old and comfortable; take the steps now to reach those #marriagegoals.